Monday, November 28, 2005
My Dilemna
Indianapolis Colts
VS.
Pittsburgh Steelers
Here's my dilemna... I live juuuuuuust south of Indianapolis. 12 miles south to exact. I live in what is called a "donut county" of Marion County (where Indianapolis is located). I have been a Steelers fan since I was just wee Disgurntled World Citizen. I should hope that the Burr will be rootin for the Steelers...
Go Stolts!
Lol
Sunday, November 27, 2005
Thoughts on my Last Post
So, if you think are standing firm be careful that you don't fall! No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out that you can stand up under it.
-- 1 Cor 10:12, 13
Consider it pure joy, my brothers whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseveance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. But when he asks he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.... Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will become the crown of life that GOd has promised to those who love him.
When tempted, no one should say "God is tempting me." For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone, but each one is tempted hn by his on evil desire he is dragged away and enticed. Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin, and sin, when it is full-grown gives birth to death....
James 1:1-17
As I did my bible study this evening I read the quote from 1 Corinthians and I thought about my last post. It seemed to really "fit," if you will with what I was thinking when I wrote it. I was tested, we all are in our own ways. Faith is made stronger through tests. Like an iron that is heated and melted and bent into the proper shape, so too faith. Faith must go through a "smelting" process that purifies it. I remember seeing a movie one time, don't ask me which one it was, but there was a line that someone quoted that was attributed to W.C.Fields, the character in the film said that on Fields' deathbead (I think) he was reading the bible and someone asked him why, his reply was "I'm looking for a loophole." That quote came to mind as I read the Corinthians. As we are tested we are given a "loophole" through prayer. Jesus tells us in the Gospels to put our burdens on him, that is our loophole. I did the eventually during my faith struggles, it just took me a long time, but I did. I do that now, too. I know now, that I can't do it alone.
James, on the other hand, sets me straight about verbage. God tests, Satan tempts. I've quoted 2 Corinthians 12 in this blog before, probably more than once, but it is important for me, at least, to know and acknowledge that, sadly, there is a chink in my armour and the thorn of sin gets in my side, but through my faith in Christ and the power of prayer I know that the chink in my armour and the thorn are the tool that Christ strenghtens his presence in my life. Is that Good Lutheran theology? I don't know if it is or not. It just feels good, though, to have the feeling that God has, pardon the expression, got my back for which I am thankful.
Peresevere, friends. Peresevere.
-- 1 Cor 10:12, 13
Consider it pure joy, my brothers whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseveance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. But when he asks he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.... Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will become the crown of life that GOd has promised to those who love him.
When tempted, no one should say "God is tempting me." For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone, but each one is tempted hn by his on evil desire he is dragged away and enticed. Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin, and sin, when it is full-grown gives birth to death....
James 1:1-17
As I did my bible study this evening I read the quote from 1 Corinthians and I thought about my last post. It seemed to really "fit," if you will with what I was thinking when I wrote it. I was tested, we all are in our own ways. Faith is made stronger through tests. Like an iron that is heated and melted and bent into the proper shape, so too faith. Faith must go through a "smelting" process that purifies it. I remember seeing a movie one time, don't ask me which one it was, but there was a line that someone quoted that was attributed to W.C.Fields, the character in the film said that on Fields' deathbead (I think) he was reading the bible and someone asked him why, his reply was "I'm looking for a loophole." That quote came to mind as I read the Corinthians. As we are tested we are given a "loophole" through prayer. Jesus tells us in the Gospels to put our burdens on him, that is our loophole. I did the eventually during my faith struggles, it just took me a long time, but I did. I do that now, too. I know now, that I can't do it alone.
James, on the other hand, sets me straight about verbage. God tests, Satan tempts. I've quoted 2 Corinthians 12 in this blog before, probably more than once, but it is important for me, at least, to know and acknowledge that, sadly, there is a chink in my armour and the thorn of sin gets in my side, but through my faith in Christ and the power of prayer I know that the chink in my armour and the thorn are the tool that Christ strenghtens his presence in my life. Is that Good Lutheran theology? I don't know if it is or not. It just feels good, though, to have the feeling that God has, pardon the expression, got my back for which I am thankful.
Peresevere, friends. Peresevere.
Opening It Up
You want to see what happens when there is no God? You want to see what happens when God has no place in your life? Where the very idea of "God" has no place anywhere? I'm watching it, right. It's strange, like Apocalypse Now strange. I'm watching Breaking Bonaduce, did I spell that right? I've known people like him. I've watched them go down a rabbit hole and I've wondered if they'll come back. i've gone down that rabbit hole myself... it wasn't any fun. It was fun when I was doing it, trust me it was a blast, but the aftermath wasn't worth it. I don't think I can actually quantify or even describe the aftermath. That was my low point. Luckily, I found the brake and I pulled it. I got out of that car, so to seak. I went there one more time, except that time my face bounced off of the corner of a coffee table and almost broke my teeth, my neck snapped back and I had a good case of whiplash for a week. I told my friends I had tripped over a shoe and fell into the table one night going to the bathroom. Yeah, I was pretty fucked up. Sorry, that's the way to describe it, but my faith that was the constant. I had it, it was right there, can you dig? It was right there inside, waiting for me to clue in; I did, eventually, took me awhile, but there it was. Rev. Wookie, he was there and he helped, I think he was instramental in my faith re-find. Now, I'm not bragging. I'm just puttin it all out there, if you get my meaning. I think that's why I'm so protective of my faith, my rock, my foundation. If I didn't have that I don't know where I'd be. There are two things no one can take from me: my education and my faith. What brought this up? Well the Breaking Bonaduce thing, but also the hymn we sang in churh today during communion "Just as I Am." That hymn always does something to me. It is more powerful than "Amazing Grace" to me. I often have a serious bout with selfobservation and I good look inside. I don't always like what I see when I look at me, but I'll tell you this: I feel better about who I am where I am and my faith I have God and Christ. Prayer works, faith works.
Thanks.
Thanks.
Friday, November 25, 2005
Thursday, November 24, 2005
Thankful
I am sitting here in the livingroom watching the end of the Lions/Falcons game. A quick look at the screen tells me that there are only 2 minutes and 21 seconds left in the 4th quarter and the Detroit Lions will be dispatched. I am not a huge fan of either team, but I am letting the Thanksgiving feast (courtesy of Cracker Barrel) settle. Sometime later on this evening we will be going to my cousins house for some "desert" and family time.
This Thanksgiving I have much to be thankful for. My father is healthy, the Lord has been with im this year and the his doctors. My mother is healthy. My cat, yes even my little grey cat is healthy, too. He is laying on the chair next to me asleep the world.
I am thankful for being back in school and working on my Masters degree in Library Science and so far I am doing pretty well.
I am thankful for a job that I love doing and I look forward to go to work every day. I am particularly thrilled about going to work tomorrow and looking forward to the busy time of year that Christmas brings to the retail industry.
I am thankful for the knowledge of Jesus Christ and the faith I have in His promise of salvation.
Strange as it might sound I am thankful for this Lutheran Blogosphere. I have been challenged in ways I didn't expect (and this is a good thing) when I first got involved with it.
It is my sincere hope and prayer that all of you have a blessed and happy Thanksgiving. May the Lord's blessing flow freely to you and yours.
Loofrin
This Thanksgiving I have much to be thankful for. My father is healthy, the Lord has been with im this year and the his doctors. My mother is healthy. My cat, yes even my little grey cat is healthy, too. He is laying on the chair next to me asleep the world.
I am thankful for being back in school and working on my Masters degree in Library Science and so far I am doing pretty well.
I am thankful for a job that I love doing and I look forward to go to work every day. I am particularly thrilled about going to work tomorrow and looking forward to the busy time of year that Christmas brings to the retail industry.
I am thankful for the knowledge of Jesus Christ and the faith I have in His promise of salvation.
Strange as it might sound I am thankful for this Lutheran Blogosphere. I have been challenged in ways I didn't expect (and this is a good thing) when I first got involved with it.
It is my sincere hope and prayer that all of you have a blessed and happy Thanksgiving. May the Lord's blessing flow freely to you and yours.
Loofrin
Wednesday, November 23, 2005
Because Sherrah Wrote About Giving
Sherrah is a friend of mine from Con-You, Austin. We had a few classes together and we worked together at Camp Lone Star. She is a thoughtful and smart woman. I always remember her as being a little on the quiet side, but when she had something to say it was usually very important and was a point that needed to be considered carefully. So, too, her blog. If for no other reason, go read her blog because she is a good writer, much better than me-- but any way, she wrote this entry about "pledge sunday" at her church. As I read it I became a bit upset. I have to give her credit for sticking around, I might of walked out of the service.
Sherrah wrote:
He said that our faith can be measured by what percentage of our income we give, and he tried to back that up with scripture. I can't remember what scripture he used, but I have a problem with that statement. Does that mean that because I don't give 10% of my income, I don't have enough faith? Does that mean my faith is less than that of someone who does give 10%?
And how do you quantify faith, anyways?
So I put my envelope in the offering plate as it passed, and I made my pledge, and I felt guilty about it. Because it's not 10%. I wish it was. I wish I was able to give 15%, or more. In this matter, it's not my faith that lacks, it's my checkbook.
I left church feeling guilty, judged, and angry... That man asked me to put a dollar amount on my faith. I've been having a conversation with God about this all day, trying to figure out if he is asking me to do more. No answer has been reached yet. I'd like to be able to give more money to church.... I'd also like to get out of debt....
It really bothered me. I know for fact that I don't give 10% of my income to the church every week. I did for awhile, but I just couldn't afford to do it, matter of fact I have had a hard time the last few months of paying bills on time.
Her pastor probably used Malachi 3:10:
Bring the whole tithe into the storehouse, that there may be food in my house. Test me in this,” says the LORD Almighty, “and see if I will not throw open the floodgates of heaven and pour out so much blessing that you will not have room enough for it.in his sermon. Which is fine. I've used that verse on myself many times when I've been struggeling with my collection envelope. But to question someone's faith by how much they put into the collection plate is just wrong. That way of looking at collection is not giving because of faith, but more like "ponying up" because you have to like paying a bill or a debt. On a side note, my church makes it real easy to "give." I can have them take it out of my checking account, all I have to do is give them my checking account number and they'll automatically debit my account for the amount... I have the form under some papers on my desk... but that is neither here nor there...
I asked my dad about it and he said that the tithe is an old testement law. I thought that was interesting. So, I thought about that for a little while and I remembered something I read in Luke a couple weeks back. The story of the old woman and her two little copper coins she put in the temple collection box:
As he looked up, Jesus saw the rich putting their gifts into the temple treasury. 2 He also saw a poor widow put in two very small copper coins. 3 “I tell you the truth,” he said, “this poor widow has put in more than all the others. 4 All these people gave their gifts out of their wealth; but she out of her poverty put in all she had to live on.”
-- Luke 21:1-4.
That widow gave what she could. Through her poverty she made a gift, a small one, sure, but to her it was probably huge. Because of her faith she gave.
Paul speaks to this in his letters. In 1 Corinthians he writes "Now about the collection for God’s people: Do what I told the Galatian churches to do. 2 On the first day of every week, each one of you should set aside a sum of money in keeping with his income..." 16:1,2(a).
This is a tricky subject. I know it is. I've been known to absent myself from church during the month of November when the talk turns to money and giving. I give what I can. I strive for ten percent, but I often fall way short. I am by no means rich, but I have faith and I am moved to give what I can.
I completely understand where Sherrah is coming from in her post. I have been thinking about it ever since I read it on Sunday night. The only two beings that know your heart are you and God. God doesn't want you to feel obligated, He wants you to give because you want to-- it is not works but faith. James writes about this when he writes:
What good is it, my brothers, if a man claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save him? 15 Suppose a brother or sister is without clothes and daily food. 16 If one of you says to him, “Go, I wish you well; keep warm and well fed,” but does nothing about his physical needs, what good is it? 17 In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.
18 But someone will say, “You have faith; I have deeds.”
Show me your faith without deeds, and I will show you my faith by what I do... James 2:14-18
I will continue to give what I can; I hope someday to be able to give more than 10 percent to the church, but until that time I will pray continually that Lord guide me in money decisions. He knows what I can give and he will bless me, just as he will bless Sherrah and her giving.
I don't know if it is scriptural, it might be, but the phrase "God, loves a cheerful giver" is important here. I believe that is true. There is a vast difference between giving because you want to and because feel you have to. There should be no guilt attached to giving to the church, it should be good feeling.
Tuesday, November 22, 2005
Can't Have Sweet without Sour
I finished reading Romans last night. Wow, what a book-- did that sound silly that last statement? Romans really is a mind bender. I have been going back through Romans looking at verses that I have underlined and highlighted (which happens to be practically the whole book) and I am just amazed at it all. Talk about a balance betwen Law and Gospel. I don't think I have really noticed that before, sily as that might sound, but I can really see how both aspects can and must be balanced. You can't have one with out the other. We can't know and enjoy the promise of salvation through Christ without first the knowledge of the damnation through the Law. I much prefer the salvation to the damnation. Or perhaps it is better said thusly: "For God has bound all men over to disobediece so that he may have mercy on them all." (Rom 11:32).
Of course then there is this: For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgement, in accordance with the measure of faith God has given you." (Rom 12:3).
One cannot have the sweet without the bitter. If all we had was sweet and never knew the taste of bitter we wouldn't know that we had sweet. Romans to me was like a glass of good clean, cold water on a hot parched day. To me, Romans has the feel of Paul sitting down and with me and saying "hey, Karl, we need to talk. I want to tell you something. Its cool, though, I think you'll really dig it."
I have been a Christian all my life. I have read the bible countless times. But I have never read it from cover to cover, I am in that process now. It has been slow going because I haven't always been real good at keeping with the reading-- I'll admit that other things get in the way-- school, internet, fun reading, sleep, any number of things. But my bible sits by my bed waiting for me to come back and drink its cool refreshing water of salvation. Sometimes its no more than a verse or two or perhaps a chapter, but invariably there is something there that strikes me and makes me go "hmmm."
So, next stop is 1 Corinthians and things start to get a bit more heavy duty. I think Paul has some talking to do to me. I hope I'll listen.
Of course then there is this: For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgement, in accordance with the measure of faith God has given you." (Rom 12:3).
One cannot have the sweet without the bitter. If all we had was sweet and never knew the taste of bitter we wouldn't know that we had sweet. Romans to me was like a glass of good clean, cold water on a hot parched day. To me, Romans has the feel of Paul sitting down and with me and saying "hey, Karl, we need to talk. I want to tell you something. Its cool, though, I think you'll really dig it."
I have been a Christian all my life. I have read the bible countless times. But I have never read it from cover to cover, I am in that process now. It has been slow going because I haven't always been real good at keeping with the reading-- I'll admit that other things get in the way-- school, internet, fun reading, sleep, any number of things. But my bible sits by my bed waiting for me to come back and drink its cool refreshing water of salvation. Sometimes its no more than a verse or two or perhaps a chapter, but invariably there is something there that strikes me and makes me go "hmmm."
So, next stop is 1 Corinthians and things start to get a bit more heavy duty. I think Paul has some talking to do to me. I hope I'll listen.
Sunday, November 20, 2005
Thursday, November 17, 2005
Thoughts While Sitting in a Barnes and Noble Cafe After Work
I have been reading Romans lately, very slowly. I find myself rereading whole chapters. I think I have read chapter 5,6,7,8 the last three nights. I have obviously read them before, those four chapters are heavily underlined and highlighted in my Bible. Romans 7:14-25 has really sung to me.
I don't know about you, but when I read the letters of Paul, any of them actually, but particularly Romans, I feel like Paul is talking to, yelling at, castigating, and comforting me. Romans has given me such comfort the last few days.
It is good to be reminded that I am saved through Grace. That the Law is there and I am judged by it, but that the Gospel trumps the Law and through Jesus Christ I am saved. I don't need anything more than faith, that's it. Simple. Easy.
I have often looked at faith as a road. I walk the faith road. In theory, it should be smooth sailing, right? But somehow I fall, trip, or am blindsided by life and sin, other times I see a neat path off the faith road and I take that, get lost and try and scurry back to the faith road. It doesn't always work and I am often scratched. I have this image of Jesus, it might not be the most Lutherand image, but it gives me great peace and joy. This image is of Jesus walking with me. Usually behind me, sometimes in front of me, and often beside me. He leads me, much like he does in Psalm 23, but as I walk and am distracted by something I lose sight of him and go off on my own. He comes and finds me, like the lost sheep in the parable. Or when I stumble and fall over a rock (i.e. Sin he stoops over and helps me back up again, brushes me off and away we go, again.
Romans is a hard book to read for me. It lays everything out so nicely and logically. I feel like I am letting someone down after I read it, but I also feel great joy that I have faith in something and someone greater than the sin I wallow in. So, I shall continue to read Romans and other Pauline letters because when it all gets boiled down it really is all about faith not about what song I sang on Sunday in church, not whether Kieshnick is the Pres of LCMS or Preus. Its not about the NIV versus the Message bible... its not about the human aspect. Its about that faith thing. That faith that I have through the Holy Spirit. That's what makes it alright, that's the thing that is most important. And for that reason I am very thankful.
I don't know about you, but when I read the letters of Paul, any of them actually, but particularly Romans, I feel like Paul is talking to, yelling at, castigating, and comforting me. Romans has given me such comfort the last few days.
It is good to be reminded that I am saved through Grace. That the Law is there and I am judged by it, but that the Gospel trumps the Law and through Jesus Christ I am saved. I don't need anything more than faith, that's it. Simple. Easy.
I have often looked at faith as a road. I walk the faith road. In theory, it should be smooth sailing, right? But somehow I fall, trip, or am blindsided by life and sin, other times I see a neat path off the faith road and I take that, get lost and try and scurry back to the faith road. It doesn't always work and I am often scratched. I have this image of Jesus, it might not be the most Lutherand image, but it gives me great peace and joy. This image is of Jesus walking with me. Usually behind me, sometimes in front of me, and often beside me. He leads me, much like he does in Psalm 23, but as I walk and am distracted by something I lose sight of him and go off on my own. He comes and finds me, like the lost sheep in the parable. Or when I stumble and fall over a rock (i.e. Sin he stoops over and helps me back up again, brushes me off and away we go, again.
Romans is a hard book to read for me. It lays everything out so nicely and logically. I feel like I am letting someone down after I read it, but I also feel great joy that I have faith in something and someone greater than the sin I wallow in. So, I shall continue to read Romans and other Pauline letters because when it all gets boiled down it really is all about faith not about what song I sang on Sunday in church, not whether Kieshnick is the Pres of LCMS or Preus. Its not about the NIV versus the Message bible... its not about the human aspect. Its about that faith thing. That faith that I have through the Holy Spirit. That's what makes it alright, that's the thing that is most important. And for that reason I am very thankful.
Thursday, November 10, 2005
I am a sinner. Plain and simple. I sin. My Old Adam is alive in well in me. I hate him, I hate the weak link in my armour. I hate the fact that I have "thorns," as Paul called them in 2 Corinthians 12:
I am a sinner. I am dirty, through and through. There is nothing I can do about it. I am a fallen creation. I am not what God intended. I don't have thorns in my side so much as big thick nails.
What brings this up?
Teresa at Be Strong in Grace wrote a post that really resonated with me. Her post spoke of fears she had when it came to the word. She comes from the Evangelical tradition of Christianity. Which, as far as I understand is very, very, very Law based. She writes about the fact that she was afraid of God and Jesus.
I must apologize to all my blogosphere friends, where ever and whomever they may be. I have tried to post something here for the last couple days, but everytime I start typing my brain just kind of shuts down and nothing comes out. I had an entry going in response to something that Teresa wrote last week or so. It as about fear and God and all that kind of stuff. Go read the post, it is probably one of the best posts I've read dealing with the differences between Lutheranism and Evangelical Chrisianity. Basically Lutherans (at least this one, i.e. me) deal with guilt. She wrote that when she was in the Evengelical movement she was more afraid of God and his wrath, if I can use that word, than anything else. She wrote about how that made her feel and what she did to make herself feel better and feel closer to God.
Her post struck a chord in me and I've found myself thinking about it alot the last week or so, particularly while driving to and from work. I have had a hard time quantifying my thoughts about it, though. I understood where she came from, though.
I don't have fear of God. I am not afraid of Him. My faith and religous background help me feel comfortable in the knowledge that Jesus is my saviour and he died for my sins, etc, etc. But I think my problem is, and from what I've been able to gather this feeling is a fairly common Lutheran problem, and that is "guilt" and "shame."
I am guilty of sin, I wrote about that at the beginning of my post,but the shame comes from the "I do it even though I know I shouldn't, but I do it any way." Paul says it much more eloquently in the episles, but I think you understand where I'm coming from.
We all have spirital thorns in our sides. Sometimes I think mine are more like large iron spikes. I find great comfort in the idea that Christ is stronger because of my weeknesses. It doesn't do much for my shame and quilt sometimes, though.
When I was a kid my father had a painting that was framed. It was a big painting, he kept in the attic because he didn't have any place to hang it. That painting used to scare the be-jesus out of me. I'm not sure why though. The painting was of a either a man or a woman, I can't remember exactly, but I seem to recall a rather androginous charcter. This person was on a very tiny island in the middle of a raging sea, holding on to a thick, rock cross for dear life. That painting always made me feel uncomfortable. I finally got my father to get rid of that painting. But as I write this I am reminded of it for another reason. I often find myself feeling like that person in the painting. Scared or what is going on around me and looking for something to hold on to. Sadly, though I don't always hold on to or seek the right thing and instead of being held fast I find myself floating and being thrashed about.
Wow, this turned into something I wasn't expecting. I'm not sure what I was expecting, actually. I just hope you went and read Teresa'spost that is the most important thing.
I must go on boasting. Although there is nothing to be gained, I will go on to visions and revelations from the Lord. 2 I know a man in Christ who fourteen years ago was caught up to the third heaven. Whether it was in the body or out of the body I do not know—God knows. 3 And I know that this man—whether in the body or apart from the body I do not know, but God knows— 4 was caught up to paradise. He heard inexpressible things, things that man is not permitted to tell. 5 I will boast about a man like that, but I will not boast about myself, except about my weaknesses. 6 Even if I should choose to boast, I would not be a fool, because I would be speaking the truth. But I refrain, so no one will think more of me than is warranted by what I do or say.
7 To keep me from becoming conceited because of these surpassingly great revelations, there was given me a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. 8 Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. 9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. 10 That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
I am a sinner. I am dirty, through and through. There is nothing I can do about it. I am a fallen creation. I am not what God intended. I don't have thorns in my side so much as big thick nails.
What brings this up?
Teresa at Be Strong in Grace wrote a post that really resonated with me. Her post spoke of fears she had when it came to the word. She comes from the Evangelical tradition of Christianity. Which, as far as I understand is very, very, very Law based. She writes about the fact that she was afraid of God and Jesus.
I must apologize to all my blogosphere friends, where ever and whomever they may be. I have tried to post something here for the last couple days, but everytime I start typing my brain just kind of shuts down and nothing comes out. I had an entry going in response to something that Teresa wrote last week or so. It as about fear and God and all that kind of stuff. Go read the post, it is probably one of the best posts I've read dealing with the differences between Lutheranism and Evangelical Chrisianity. Basically Lutherans (at least this one, i.e. me) deal with guilt. She wrote that when she was in the Evengelical movement she was more afraid of God and his wrath, if I can use that word, than anything else. She wrote about how that made her feel and what she did to make herself feel better and feel closer to God.
Her post struck a chord in me and I've found myself thinking about it alot the last week or so, particularly while driving to and from work. I have had a hard time quantifying my thoughts about it, though. I understood where she came from, though.
I don't have fear of God. I am not afraid of Him. My faith and religous background help me feel comfortable in the knowledge that Jesus is my saviour and he died for my sins, etc, etc. But I think my problem is, and from what I've been able to gather this feeling is a fairly common Lutheran problem, and that is "guilt" and "shame."
I am guilty of sin, I wrote about that at the beginning of my post,but the shame comes from the "I do it even though I know I shouldn't, but I do it any way." Paul says it much more eloquently in the episles, but I think you understand where I'm coming from.
We all have spirital thorns in our sides. Sometimes I think mine are more like large iron spikes. I find great comfort in the idea that Christ is stronger because of my weeknesses. It doesn't do much for my shame and quilt sometimes, though.
When I was a kid my father had a painting that was framed. It was a big painting, he kept in the attic because he didn't have any place to hang it. That painting used to scare the be-jesus out of me. I'm not sure why though. The painting was of a either a man or a woman, I can't remember exactly, but I seem to recall a rather androginous charcter. This person was on a very tiny island in the middle of a raging sea, holding on to a thick, rock cross for dear life. That painting always made me feel uncomfortable. I finally got my father to get rid of that painting. But as I write this I am reminded of it for another reason. I often find myself feeling like that person in the painting. Scared or what is going on around me and looking for something to hold on to. Sadly, though I don't always hold on to or seek the right thing and instead of being held fast I find myself floating and being thrashed about.
Wow, this turned into something I wasn't expecting. I'm not sure what I was expecting, actually. I just hope you went and read Teresa'spost that is the most important thing.
Tuesday, November 08, 2005
See, God is Colts Fan....
... why else would the Colts uniforms be blue and white, just like a nice summer sky?
YES!!! COLTS BEAT PATS!! 40-21!!!! Great to be a Colts fan!
YES!!! COLTS BEAT PATS!! 40-21!!!! Great to be a Colts fan!
Sunday, November 06, 2005
Did Paul Sleep Here? Perhaps Peter?
I just saw this news story on Yahoo. Quite intresting. I wonder
Paul Maier might have to say about it.
Paul Maier might have to say about it.
Israeli prisoner Ramil Razilo was removing rubble from the planned site of a new prison ward when his shovel uncovered the edge of an elaborate mosaic, unveiling what Israeli archaeologists said Sunday may be the Holy Land's oldest church.
The discovery of the church in the northern Israeli town of Megiddo, near the biblical Armageddon, was hailed by experts as an important discovery that could reveal details about the development of the early church in the region. Archaeologists said the church dated from the third century, decades before Constantine legalized Christianity across the Byzantine Empire.
"What's clear today is that it's the oldest archaeological remains of a church in Israel, maybe even in the entire region. Whether in the entire world, it's still too early to say," said Yotam Tepper, the excavation's head archaeologist.
Israeli officials were giddy about the discovery, with Prime Minister Ariel Sharon calling the church "an amazing story."
Vatican officials also hailed the find.
"A discovery of this kind will make Israel more interesting to all Christians, for the church all over the world," said Archbishop Pietro Sambi, the Vatican envoy to Jerusalem. "If it's true that the church and the beautiful mosaics are from the third century, it would be one of the most ancient churches in the Middle East."
Razilo, who is serving a two-year sentence for traffic violations, was one of about 50 prisoners brought into the high-security Megiddo Prison to help excavate the area before the construction of new wards for 1,200 Palestinian prisoners.
Razilo was shocked to uncover the edge of the mosaic. The inmates worked for months to uncover all the parts of the mosaic — the floor of the church, he said.
"We continued to look and slowly we found this whole beautiful thing," said Razilo, who used a sponge and a bucket of water to clean dirt off the uncovered mosaics Sunday.
Two mosaics inside the church — one covered with fish, an ancient Christian symbol that predates the cross — tell the story of a Roman officer and a woman named Aketous who donated money to build the church in the memory "of the god, Jesus Christ."
Pottery remnants from the third century, the style of Greek writing used in the inscriptions, ancient geometric patterns in the mosaics and the depiction of fish rather than the cross indicate that the church was no longer used by the fourth century, Tepper said.
The church's location, not far from the spot where the New Testament says the final battle between good and evil will take place, also made sense because a bishop was active in the area at the time, said Tepper, who works with the Israel Antiquities Authority.
The inscription, which specifies that Aketous donated a table to the church, indicates the house of worship predated the Byzantine era, when Christians began using altars in place of tables in their rituals, Tepper said. Remnants of a table were uncovered between the two mosaics.
The building — most of which was destroyed — also was not built in the Basilica style that was standard under the Byzantines, he added.
Stephen Pfann, a biblical scholar and professor at the Holy Land University, said the second and third centuries were transitional periods where people sought to define their religious beliefs and modes of worship. Iconography and inscriptions found in Nazareth and Caperneum — places where Jesus lived — show that people went there to worship, although most did so secretly.
"This was a time of persecution and in this way it is quite surprising that there would be such a blatant expression of Christ in a mosaic, but it may be the very reason why the church was destroyed," Pfann said.
The dig will continue as archaeologists try to uncover the rest of the building and its surroundings, including what they believe could be a baptismal site, Tepper said.
Joe Zias, an anthropologist and former curator with the antiquities authority, questioned the dating of the find, saying there is no evidence of churches before the fourth century. The building may have been in use earlier, but most likely not for Christian religious purposes, he said.
"They're going to be hard, hard-pressed to prove it ... because the evidence argues otherwise," Zias said.
Wind Blown Church Service
We had an interesting church service this morning. We had no power. We had big rain and wind storms last night here in Indiana. If you've seen the news at all you've probably heard about the tornadoes that blew through Evansville (what was it we used to say Con-you... "Go Tornadoes! Treat 'em like a trailor park...")and blew away a manufactured home park. They say on the news that in Kentucky and Indiana there are 16 dead.
We just experiecned some heavy rain and big winds. It was enough to knock the power at church. So they used a piano for music. It was actually a pretty nice service. Very relaxing, almost too relaxing actually-- I found myself struggeling to stay awake. It was very calm. This is one of the few times I've actually seem Missouri Synod Lutherans willing sit in the front of the church (that's where the windows are).
We just experiecned some heavy rain and big winds. It was enough to knock the power at church. So they used a piano for music. It was actually a pretty nice service. Very relaxing, almost too relaxing actually-- I found myself struggeling to stay awake. It was very calm. This is one of the few times I've actually seem Missouri Synod Lutherans willing sit in the front of the church (that's where the windows are).
Thursday, November 03, 2005
Toy
I got a new toy today. It is an expensive toy, but I decided that it will come in handy as I start doing big projects in school...
I bought a laptop compter today.
Lord Ha' mercy...
I bought a laptop compter today.
Lord Ha' mercy...
Tuesday, November 01, 2005
This'll Brighten Your Day
A new pastor was visiting in the homes of his parishioners. At one house it seemed obvious that someone was at home, but no answer came to his repeated knocks at the door.
Therefore, he took out a card and wrote "Revelation 3:20" on the back of it and stuck it in the door.
When the offering was processed the following Sunday, he found that his card had been returned. Added to it was this cryptic message,"Genesis 3:10."
Reaching for his Bible to check out the citation, he broke up in gales of laughter. Revelation 3:20 begins "Behold, I stand at the door and knock."
Genesis 3:10 reads, "I heard your voice in the garden and I was afraid for I was naked."
Remember when the funniest jokes were the clean ones? They still are! "A cheerful heart is good medicine" (Prov. 17:22a)
Therefore, he took out a card and wrote "Revelation 3:20" on the back of it and stuck it in the door.
When the offering was processed the following Sunday, he found that his card had been returned. Added to it was this cryptic message,"Genesis 3:10."
Reaching for his Bible to check out the citation, he broke up in gales of laughter. Revelation 3:20 begins "Behold, I stand at the door and knock."
Genesis 3:10 reads, "I heard your voice in the garden and I was afraid for I was naked."
Remember when the funniest jokes were the clean ones? They still are! "A cheerful heart is good medicine" (Prov. 17:22a)
I Have to Fill this Space Wit Sumpin, I 'Spose
I originally had the "what movies have you watched" thing-a-ma-jig here, but when I put it in my blog it messed it up, so I deleted it and, as a result I had a blank space with a date. Now, we can't have that can we?
I was reading Acts yesterday afternoon. And I read about Peter getting sprung from prison by *insert ominous music* An Angel of the Lord. (Acts 12). I just started to chuckle as I pictured Peter banging on Mary's door trying to get in. From what I understand Peter did not stand tomfoolery very well. I imagine him knocking gently at first and then as the people inside refused him admittance he didn't just knock on the door, but full fisted it. I can even imagine him muttering curses under his breath. For some reason I just found this whole thing to be funny.
I was reading Acts yesterday afternoon. And I read about Peter getting sprung from prison by *insert ominous music* An Angel of the Lord. (Acts 12). I just started to chuckle as I pictured Peter banging on Mary's door trying to get in. From what I understand Peter did not stand tomfoolery very well. I imagine him knocking gently at first and then as the people inside refused him admittance he didn't just knock on the door, but full fisted it. I can even imagine him muttering curses under his breath. For some reason I just found this whole thing to be funny.
Whew... That Was a Close One
This a thing I never want to see directed at me: Bill Cower giving me that look. Huh-uh, nope. I think I might dieI certainly hope that Scott, who writes Burr In the Burgh is happy, I'm thrilled... tired, but thrilled. Mah, Stillers won, but barely.
I think I just about had a heart attack as I watched the Greatest Team of All Time come within a cat's whisker of losing to the Baltimore Ravens! We can't have that!
I sat in the living room waving my Terrible Towel over my head.(More Terrible Towel) Quietly rooting for my team so I didn't wake anybody up. It was more like a quiet sportsprayer... and the football gods came through.
Next week: The Colts take on the The Evil Empire in New England. This will be a big game for them, the Colts and especially for Peyton Manning, he has some serious monkey-on-the-back issues with this team. I will be rooting hard for the home team next week. The problem, though arises a few weeks hence when the Colts and Steelers clash on a Monday Night. I've been a Steelers fan since I was but a lil Loofrin... I moved to Indiana just about four years ago and I have been rooting for the Colts ever since. Its just not fair I tell you. Its just not fair.
But I'll worry about that later. Right now, I'll just savour the Steelers one point win over the Ravens. Yes, indeed.
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