Friday, December 31, 2004


A man said to the universe:
"Sir, I exist!"
"However," replied the universe,
"The fact has not created in me
A sense of obligation."

-- Stephen Crane

The last figures I heard were somewhere around 121,000. It could of been more, but that was the last figures I remember hearing. I feel oddly detached to the whole tsunami thing in far east. 121,000 people are gone in an instant. Poof. When I first heard about it and saw some of the footage I immediately thought Hollywood already did that movie last year. I know that sounds horrible.

All I know is this one of the dead was an interpretor that a pastor friend of ours used when he taught at the Lutheran Seminary in Sri Lanka. This man had just finished translating the The Book of Concord into Sri Lankan language. This man and his wife were killed on the train that was washed away by the tsunami. That is just one of thousands. That's enough for me. I don't need to know any more.

The poem I quoted above has gotten me in trouble before. I quoted it one time and someone got all upset with me (this was in another place and another time) and decided I was an "evolutionist" (I'm not. For the record I believe wholeheartedly in the Creation as found in Genesis 1). I think the poem above just illistrates my feeling of me in the world. I am a very small portion a "cog" if you will. When something like a tsunami or earthquake or big rain storm happens I often think of that poem. Nature makes me feel so small, so inconsequential. Tiny.

I don't have much more to say about it. The tsunami is more like a feeling to me, I can't put my hat on it, its almost a theory. I don't know. I just don't know.

Sunday, December 26, 2004

Mug 285

Today I did something that I have been thinking about doing for a while. I purchased a mug in Fox and Hound Mug Club. It was twenty-five bucks. The Fox and Hound is my northside watering hole. Its on the way home from work and a place for me to get a glass of suds. They serve beer three ways: bottle, 16 oz, and 23 oz glasses. I usually kick it with a 23 oz. Naturally, though, the 16 oz a bit cheaper then the 23 oz. Hence, my decision to get involved in the Mug Club.

Here's what I got for my twenty-five bucks:

-- One personalized mug (note: what that means is this: a white ceramic beer mug on which I scrawled my name with a Sharpy pen).

-- 23 oz mug of draft beer for the price of a pint (note: This is a good thing).

-- Free mug of beer on your birthday. (note: This is a good thing, too).

-- 1/2 price wings (note: this is a very good thing).

-- Lifetime membership.

My mug number is 285. I even have a little card to put in my wallet. I think that just about sums it all up.

Sunday, December 19, 2004


Tonight at work I started to talk like Vito Coleoene, the Godfather. It wasn't because I wanted to, at least not at first. I woke up this morning with a scratchy throat. It went as the day progressed, but when I got to work and after talking to customers for a few hours I started to get the scratchy feeling again and I could hear my voice starting to waver. So I made it a bit more airated and whispered a bit. That made my throat feel better. So I continued doing it the rest of the evening. The longer I did it the more "Godfather-esque" I started to sound. It was great fun.

I bought some Christmas cards today. Buying Christmas cards is always a big deal for me. This may sound funny, but I have a phobia of mailing cards. I know, get the white jacketed folks, quick, but its a weird thing. Now that I have bought the cards I will fill them out, address them. The trick is to get them stamped. Stamping them means I really have to send them. And in the back of my mind, no matter how silly the front part of my mind says it is, there is a little voice that says "they're" (not sure who THEY are, by the way) "are going to read these. They're watching you, right now..." But I've bought the cards. I'll mail them Monday. I must. It is essential.

For the Saturday before Christmas I thought it was actually quite slow this evening. We still did very well in sales, but I thought it would be busier, I'm not complaining per se, but well... maybe I am.

Saturday, December 18, 2004

World Gone Mad, Again

This is just... I can't think of a word other "sick." I mean, woman killing another woman and then taking her baby, let me rephrase that, doing a grissly C-section and surgically removing an almost to term baby from the dead mother's womb... what is the woman charged with... Kidnapping that resulted in death...? WHAT THE HELL! sounds like premediated murder to me. The Rev. mah-ROHN-eye Large, aka the Texas Mick (I really hope he doesn't mind me calling him that) has a great post on this. Check it out.

Reading the paper this morning was a tough thing. With that horrible story about the murdered mother on page one and a story about the choir director of Robert Schuller's Crystal Cathedral took his own life yesterday a few hours before a big Christmas program in a bathroom of the Crystal Cathedral. I hate suicide. I get so angry when I hear about it. I had a friend five years ago kill himself. It took me a very long to work through my anger and guilt-- I felt like I partially responsible, I won't get into that right now, maybe someother time.

I dunno, I just don't have much to write.

Tuesday, December 14, 2004

oops, george.

(gary varvel, indianapolis star)

Okay, George, you've done pretty well so far, but you flubbed this one, I mean really.

Monday, December 13, 2004

"the knock"

i call it the knock. i still have it. i can hear it. i want to answer it, i really do, but i can't. i have reasons. i hope He understands. i really hope He does...

Wednesday, December 08, 2004

To Bloomington We Shall Go

I went to IU Basketball game tonight in Bloomington with a coworker. He has season tickets and he needed someone to go with him... hmmm, let me think about that for a second... pick me, pick me! It was a lot of fun, but the Hoosiers lost to Notre Dame for the first time in 13 home games. Neither team looked especially good, but IU looked horrid. I don't know a whole lot about basketball, but I can tell when a team just ain't clickin.

Here's a reason for the Texas Mick (aka mah-ROEN-eye) to roll up to Indiana someday: Irish Food. My coworker and I went to the Irish Lion for dinner. I had three pints of beer: a Guiness and two Bass Ales. They had these things called "yards" which were great big fluted glases with a big bulb at the bottom and a very long stem. Out waiter (who looked for everything in the world like a leprachaun) told us that a yard holds a little more then a pitcher of beer. I might of gone for it, but in the back of my mind I knew:
1. I was going to have to negotiate very steep, thin, concrete steps
2. once in my row at the basketball game breaking the seal would not be easy
3. Climbing over those in my row would be difficult at best and down right rude.

So I forewent the yard, but it is on my to-do list for sometime in the future.

Please Santa? Pretty Please? I've Been A Good Boy This Year....

Monday, December 06, 2004

Dig this: A Little "Follow the Leader," If You Will

This morning I sat down in front of my computer and dialed up my dial-up modem and commenced to (trudge) through the internet. I checked Jason's BlogTexas Cooking and nothing's going on over there. Then I checked Bek's Antisocial Blog and found out she has selfdiagnosed herself as having Adult ADD, sure why, not. Sounds like a good time. And then I went here, to Random Thoughts of a Confessional Lutheran. He has an interesting blog, I don't read very often, but it is entertaining. I think if I read more I'd dig it even more, he seems to have a good sense of humor. But while I was toolin around in his Blog I discovered a Blogcircles link that said something about Missouri Synod Blogs. So, I clicked on a Blog in that section that sounded interesting. It really wasn't, but that's okay. When I got to THAT blog I found another link Blogcircle link that said Con U at Austin Blog Ring it is hosted by I even found a blog of someone I worked with at camp oh so many summers ago. If I read her blog right she is in St. Louis teaching and, doh, of dohs!, she sounds to be hugged up. That's all right, good for her.

Sadly, though, I have to do some preparation for the upcoming armegeddon-- err, I mean the GRE test that I have to take in two week's time.

The Colt's tore up Jacksonville yesterday. Daaa-yum. If this isn't the Colt's year then I don't know what is. I only got to see the last quarter of the Steeler game and my stomach was in my throat as I watched the Steelers march down the field and get in position for their final field goal... it was good... whew.

Okay, enough stalling. Time to mosey on outta here and start the GRE prep.... *kicks a can* phooey.

Saturday, December 04, 2004

This One is For Mah-ROE-neye

My friend, one word: BACON!

Prep: 10 min
Bake: 50 min + cooling

3 cups biscuit/baking mix
1 cup milk
2 eggs, beaten
2 tablespoons dried minced onion
Dash hot pepper sauce
3/4 cup shredded cheddar cheese
12 bacon strips, cooked, and crumbled
1/2 cup chopped walnuts

In a large bowl, combine the biscuit mix, milk, eggs, onion and pepper sauce just until moistened. Stir cheese, bacon and walnuts. spread into a greased 9 inche by 5 inche x 3 inche loaf pan.

Bake @ 350 degrees for 48-52 minutes or until toothpick poked in center comes out clean. Cool for 10 minutes before removing from pan to a wire rack to cool completely. Yield 1 loaf

Wednesday, December 01, 2004

Personal Ministry Moment

I learned a couple things today. The first is in the state of Indiana it is Legal for one person to drink a pitcher of beer. How do I know this? It was a pitcher of beer the washed down my chicken wings that I had for lunch (yes, I know a very healthy lunch-- I'm gonna have to stop doing that. Its not good for me or my heart). I was shocked when I discovered this. A few weeks ago I went to my usual watering hole and had a couple beers. The bartender said I should just get a pitcher, it was cheaper. I'm still living with Texas liquor laws on my mind (as weird and bizarre as they were). I was under the assumption that you had to have at least two people working on a pitcher (that's the way it was in Texas) not so here in Indiana. So I had a pitcher of beer today and damn, was it good. And believe it or not I don't feel none the worse for wear.

The other thing I learned is this: porn makes me feel queezy. Really it does. It makes me feel sick to my stomach. Today was a day of sin for me. I had the day off and I was bored. I stopped off at the video store and bought a movie and rented a porn dvd, why? I haven't a clue. It seemed like a good idea at the time. Its been YEARS since I last rented porn, probably college... what's that five years? So I rented one today. I got home, put the disk in my computer and in a couple seconds flat I turned it off put it back in the little plastic case it came in and had nothing to do with it. I felt sick and it wasn't an I've-had-too-much-beer-and-wings kind of sick it was something deeper then that. It was almost a revoltion. I felt dirty and filthy inside. Empty. It was just such a base feeling, if you know what I mean. I can't really describe it. I've been out of sorts all night because of it. I feel like done something horribly and dispicably wrong. But I'm working on changing that feeling to one of hope. I am often brought back to "life" if you will by this:
...but I will not boast about myself, except about my weaknesses. Even if I should choose to boast, I would not be a fool, because I would be speaking the truth. But I refrain, so no one will think more of me than is warranted by what I do or say.
To keep me from becoming conceited because of these surpassingly great revelations, there was given me a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in ardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong. -- 2 Cor. 5(b)-11
The New International Version, (Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan Publishing House) 1984

There are things I know I need to work on. I know I'm not perfect. I'm not a big fan of those "Jesus Loves You" bumpersticker type things, but there is one that has really meant a lot to me: I'm not perfect, I'm forgiven. How true, how true indeed.

Then there is this:
Flee the evil desires of youth, and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, along with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart
-- 2 Tim 2:22 That is easier said then done, but that's why we have both those lovely things called Law and Gospel, right?

There's more. This comes from 1 Corinthians chapter 10: "No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it."

Let's hop over to my favorite book in the Bible and see what James has to say about this: "Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him.
When tempted, no one should say, “God is tempting me.” For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone; but each one is tempted when, by his own evil desire, he is dragged away and enticed. Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death.
Don’t be deceived, my dear brothers. Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows. He chose to give us birth through the word of truth, that we might be a kind of firstfruits of all he created. (James 1:12-18)

I am not perfect. I fall, alot. But as I've gotten older and become more sure of who I am and who God is I can see His Grace in my life. I am guilty, but because of a faith I have I am forgiven.

this is... i dunno what to say... frightening, maybe?

But mama is kinda cute, dontcha think?

Click here for Snarkyspot's Blog

This is funny on one level, but not so funny on many others. I'll admit I chuckled, but then really looked at the picture and kind of shivered.