In Which Your Faithful Narrator Gets a Shot of Needed Self-Confidence

Last night I discovered a website that listed library jobs. I started perusing some of them and I discovered, happily, that I might actually be qualified for a good many of them. There is a nice feature that lists jobs by states and then those states have links to universities and public libraries, so I spent about an hour or more happily bouncing around the country looking at library jobs.

I found a few that were enticing, but I didn't send my resume or anything because I didn't have my thumbdrive that has my resume on it. As a matter of fact, I've been thinking I need to redo my resume. Make it look more professional, the problem with that is I dislike working on my resume. I don't like "bragging" about myself.

When I didn't get the job I interviewed for a few weeks back I was actually more crushed than I led myself to believe. That, I won't call it a failure, really took the wind out of my sails, but yesterday I learned that classmate of mine got a job in a library in Savannah, GA. I figured, if she can do it, why can't I? I think I've mentioned my dilemma when it comes to my self-confidence. I can be my own worst enemy when it comes to that kind of thing.

In other news, but kind of in the same vein, I finally got my degree in the mail today. I'm, dare I say it... stoked. I feel like taking that degree and showing some of my teachers that told me I wouldn't get out of high school that I did, in fact not only get out of high school, I went to college and got an A.A. degree, a Bachelors, and now, my friends, a Masters.

Am I allowed to feel proud of myself for a little while? I don't think I can express here, in words, the feeling of accomplishment I have; it feels good to be able to say to my teachers from the past "I showed you!" And the 16-year old dishwasher who made a promise to himself that he would in fact get a masters degree someday can feel especially proud of himself for achieving that which many didn't think he could do.

So, to Mr. Campenero, my fourth grade teacher: I DID IT! To Miss Miller, my high school English teacher who told me I shouldn't try and take the English 101 class my senior year: I DID IT! To Mrs. Walsh, my Spanish teacher: I DID IT!

Now, I just have to take this good feeling and turn it into something positive. That's going to be the trick. I have to be careful because that voice of self-doubt will rear its ugly head.

Oh, did I mention that about two weeks ago I requested information from Concordia Ft. Wayne? Never hurts to look into things, right?